I've noticed a disturbing trend among my students. A lot of my kids just can't focus on some one talking. They can't really do it that well. The interesting thing is that it seems to be wholly independent of whatever the person is talking about. I had a lesson on dating this week. Now this may seem like a boring subject to some people, but I assure you to Chinese high school kids, it doesn't get any better than this.
My understanding is that most Chinese high schools tell their students they're not allowed to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. The first day I got here, when I was new and interesting to the students (which now I don't think I am...) They wanted to know if I had a girlfriend and when I said that I didn't literally, I had everyone's undivided attention. It was kind of awesome.
But now, I the second class starts some kids shut off before I can even say what the lesson is on. I think that most of this is due to technology. It's not all kids, but it's a fair few. Most kids don't do it in my classes because they know I'll take their phones if they're caught (of which I've already taken 2 today and I've only taught two classes so far). Now here's the thing that scares me. Is as a business student at BYU I was the same way. I still paid attention in most of my classes. I got good grades and I knew what the teacher had talked about. But I had played games on my laptop too and I'm definitely guilty of checking my email in class and reading the news too.
So what is it? Why is it so hard to at least listen to somebody for two or three minutes before we shut off in a lecture setting and decide that they're not worth listening too when we can hook up to our ipod or our cell phone. Luckily they're no laptops in church. But at the same time, I'm still guilty in that setting to.
Elder Hales used to seem so boring to me when I was a kid. He's not a flash speaker and I don't remember him ever having my full attention before I was 19. Lame I know. Anyways, as I got older and a little more mature I started going back to read the conference talks within a month of two of watching conference. I remember one specific time where I went back and read his talks and it blew my socks off. It was amazing. I thought 'how could this be? He's the boring one!'... nope, he sure isn't. I just didn't have the patience to sit and listen to him. Now he's one of my favorites. His talks never cease to have an impact on me.
I think 100 or 200 years ago this wasn't the case. There were no distractions and listening was easy. You went to a church and all you did was listen. You had things to talk about, but it was never so serious you talked about it IN a church meeting. Especially not for the whole meeting. Now things are different. In a classroom we have so many gadgets that I think it's legitimately hard to give you're attention to a teacher. We're too used to 15-25 second commercials and fast changes in what we're paying attention too that it's hard to sit and listen to someone for a half hour. I think listening is a form of work for our generation. Wierd I know. Maybe it's always been true, but it's totally true for us. We live in such a time of information that is so readily available that we don't realize how much it's worth. Some people do, and those people are my heroes. One of them is Mike Wilson. I've never known someone who was a doctor that taught political philosophy on the side. That alone is a testament to his love of knowledge. For a guy that practically has ADHD (me), I can't help but admire someone who has that much focus. Another one is my uncle Gary. He's really good at keeping up on technology. He know's a lot and he makes it his business to understand what's going on in the world. I think if I had half the discipline either of them have, I'd be set.
I watched part of a conservative rally outside the capital building in DC. This was right after the health bill had passed in the house of representatives. I can understand why conservatives didn't like the health bill, but it was funny. As I listened to this man I heard him say that this (the new health bill he held in his hands) is 2,000 pages of crap. Now it may have been crap. But it was funny because he didn't say why, he just ripped on democrats. I don't think a single person walked away from that meeting understand more about life or government, but I think they did all leave more angry then they had come. Productive? I don't really think so.
I think had people really been listening, it might have made a big difference. Not in the sense that they would have changed their minds, but that a person who has an opinion ought to be able to defend himself and ought to be able to listen to the opinion of someone else even if they don't agree. At least it promotes education and progress. I think it would even lead to a solution if we gave it a chance.
I really believe that listening is a gift. It's a talent that people don't think about often, but it's worth gold if we can develop it. I think one of the problems with politics today is that people have forgotten how to listen. I realize these are all random stories, but they all point to the fact that if people can listen, it could make a world of difference.
In conclusion I think listening would bless America, Chinese teenagers, and me.
And it's cool that I have a blog, cause than I can write about whatever I want. But this for me is a forum too. I love people's comments and I'll always listen. Or at least try to.
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5 comments:
I totally agree Sam! I've also noticed that for many people it's also "work" to read things. I think it's largely based on distractions and information overload. I used to work in a computer lab and every once in a while the internet would stop working for a little while. We would put up signs on our desk saying the internet wasn't working, and yet people would still come up to us to tell us their internet wasn't working. We finally resorted to hanging the sign from the doorway with like 2 feet of tape so that it would hang way down at face level. They couldn't help but see it or else they'd smack right into it.
We are the guinea pig generation of the developmental effects of electronic technological integration in human lives during development.
I agree. Listening ALL THE TIME just takes so much energy. :)
Thanks for the compliment, Sam. As a fellow ADHD I have a hard time with focus, but over the many years I developed a way to tune out everything but what I am interested in, be it a conference talk or something on my laptop screen. I am hard of hearing so tuning out sounds is not as hard as motions near me or other disturbances. I have to put my toys away in order to listen and learn. But I have to admit that this only works when the topic is interesting to me. I find something to learn in almost everything but sometimes I cannot get my mind to click into focus mode. I do have a need to know why things work, to understand enabling technology, taking something new and going backwards until I understand how it's made.
I really have trouble only doing one thing at a time.
I know what you are talking about in your posting, just trying to get through a family home evening. IPODs and cell phones and the the temptation they provide us to trip out into something we can select for ourselves is a more interesting thing than the patience it takes to listen and sort through the words for something that makes a difference to us. After listening to past instruction we know that there may not be anything that we want to hear. Many of today's young people, in any part of the world, are more comfortable tuning into the world they understand and enjoy, making it very difficult to teach them.
Visiting Colorado last week, I met a Chinese family in the food court at Costco. First I noticed the crying little one year old boy who stopped crying when I made faces at him. then his parents and both sets of grand parents. The young couple live in Colorado but both sets of grandparents had come from China for Christmas and were staying with the couple in their small apartment. I mentioned that you were teaching English in China and they seemed really offended that I could not name the province you were living in. The grandpa that I talked to understood English perfectly but gave up trying to speak to me in English because of my difficulty hearing. He began to tell his son in Chinese what to tell me in English. We had a 20 minute conversation while I waited for Dave Nelson to finish shopping. I really enjoyed visiting with them. They were so very polite. When Dave came to pick me up they all stood and shook our hands.
I was in Colorado for Kenny's graduation from the University of Colorado in Boulder. I miss you and hope you are having a blast.
This is part of the epidemic that our generation struggles with, i think. It's really wrecking kids. I know im totally messed up as a result of my technology/distraction fixation. i haven't been able to attend an hour of class since kindergarten without a pen and paper in my hand without becoming a distraction.
China is pioneering a lot for us they're very concerned as a nation for their kids and their electronic media use. we'll have to see what happens...
Sam, I finally found your blog. I didn't know you had one until recently. You've got some great commentary on life here. I enjoy reading your thoughts.
Your sis,
Jenni
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